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Are you aware of the fact that the way we talk to Child will become their inner voice? Childhood is the stage where an individual spends time with their family, school friends, and teachers. Being in the first stage of life, they are introduced to the dos and don’ts of the world through the aforementioned people. In other words, they act as the door for the children to step outside into the world. This is the prime age where an individual’s character modulation takes place. With that said, the way we talk to our children during their childhood holds more significance than we imagine.
But how can we positively impact with the way we talk to child? Here are 5 points to help you:
1. The prime age to discipline
As an adult, we have come across uncountable experiences in life, both bitter and happy ones. We learn endless lessons from these experiences. Hence, we get to know the what and what not to be practiced and preached. But children get easily influenced by their surroundings and the way we talk to child and tend to imitate their immediate environment, without even realizing if it’s the right thing to do.
The aforesaid immediate environment refers to the group of people the child interacts with and all the actions performed by them. This is when the cognitive and socioemotional development of the child takes place. Therefore, utmost care must be taken to instill positive thoughts to carve out the best in the child.
2. Appreciate them often
Ordinarily, a person tends to criticise more than appreciate someone. In psychology, we refer to it as negative bias. The human brain focuses on the negative things (emotions, unpleasant thoughts, events, etc.) rather than the positive aspects of life.
Relating this notion with our daily interaction with kids including the way we talk to child as well as the way we behave in front of them, our tendency to observe and criticize their misbehavior is comparatively higher than our proclivity to acknowledge their appropriate behavior. Therefore, to keep them motivated and happy, appreciate them for the little things they do. This needn’t be a great achievement they have gained. Rather it can be as simple as cleaning their room, sharing their belongings with the siblings, or even helping their parents in the household chores.
3. Encourage open conversation
Children are always curious to know about everything they hear and see around them. In this digital age, children run into subject matters like puberty, gender identity, reproductive organs in the human body, dating, romantic relationships, LGBTQ, menstruation, etc.
This is when they ask their doubts and questions regarding the same. But parents often try to shut their mouths saying this isn’t something to be asked and discussed in the public. This creates a stigma around these topics in their mind and later on they will be embarrassed to talk about these issues, having bottled them up when they were a child. So, to avoid a circumstance like this, parents and teachers must encourage an open conversation with the kids to discuss and educate them about their doubts and inquiries that seem appropriate to their age.
4. Do not compare them with others
Comparing your child with other kids based on their academics, talents, or even behavior and the way we talk to child communicating this can abruptly affect the child. With the misconception of developing a sense of competitiveness and determination, parents keep on comparing the kids with others. But on the contrary, this can incite feelings of inferiority complex and often make them feel pressured to do better beyond their capabilities.
This is when they forget to enjoy the journey towards success, but rather get agitated and frustrated whenever they fail to meet the expectations set by others around them. Instead of prompting them to compare their weaknesses against other’s strengths, parents should guide them to compare themselves with their past achievements and failures and thereby evaluate themselves based on it.
5. Teach them how to apologize
Humans make mistakes. There is nothing wrong with making mistakes. But not acknowledging one’s mistakes and not apologizing for the same is misconduct. Children learn basic manners and moral values from their parents and teachers. So, they tend to imitate our ways of living, the way we interact with others, and the way we take care of ourselves. As a result, the way we talk to child, as well as our actions, have a huge impact on them. So, apologise to your partner and your children after a fight or an argument for your misbehavior. Thus, your children will also not hesitate to apologise for their wrongdoings when they step into the world.
The way we talk to a child as well as interact with them plays a crucial role in shaping their inner selves. Even our minute actions can influence their behavior modulation. Nobody wants their child to be labeled as anything less than good. To achieve the same, we must start practicing what we preach. Behave and interact in a way, we want them to behave to others. Being an active listener to sharing your thoughts calmly and respectfully will not only enhance their communication skills but will also help them develop positive self-esteem.
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